i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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