Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize