let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Randomize
