pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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