So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize