Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
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