yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
