so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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