They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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