Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize
