I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Randomize