thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
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