how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Randomize
