I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
