ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize