it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
