he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
