I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize