i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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