You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Randomize
