Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
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