Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
