He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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