My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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