listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
