summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Someone signed my nipple.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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