I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
sex in a hospital.. check
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
