We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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