he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
It was confusing and full of hummus
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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