we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Randomize
