Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
