unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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