You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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