I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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