Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
