Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
