i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
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