Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
