And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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