so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
