I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize