I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
