Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
