What did we do last night that was yellow?
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
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