it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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