Non-Jews are for practice
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Randomize
