Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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