your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
