I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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