In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize